Parenting

Ok, so parenting is something I think about regularly, partly because I'd love to have children now, and partly because I see children who are either behaving or not behaving and it makes me think about it, or I talk to teens at work and think...wow...that parent needs to let them grow up.
So, no I'm not prego, this is just something I was thinking about the other day.

I have known several people in the past and present who I think of as "childish." Some of these people are children so...it doesn't count against them, and some are teenagers and adults, and I do consider that...not so good.
When I say childish I mean their ideas about the world and how things work are childish. They don't understand other people's feelings or point of views, and are completely happy in their state of "childishness" even though they are no longer children. These people are also immature about the world and worldly things. Who does it help if we are immature about the world that we live in?

Why are these people like that?? Well...I think I have found a link between those that I know who are like this. I could be wrong, this is just what I am thinking. These are people who's parents kept them OVERLY sheltered. Which would make sense about why they are immature when it comes to the things that happen in this world. Their parents probably sheltered them so much, they didn't realize these things go on, or when they asked their parents about these things, they ignored them or told them it was wrong and didn't ever give any explanation. When we don't understand why things are wrong how can we have a mature, adult attitude about them?

Am I saying sheltering your children is wrong? NOWAY!!! We do need to protect them and shelter them, but I'm saying there is a point where they NEED to grow up and learn reasons and know about the world they will be living in. (and I don't think it is when they turn 18 or when they graduate from college, nor do I think it happens all at once, but this should happen in the home as they grow)

I feel like I was sheltered as a child, but in a good way. I think my mom and dad did a great job of balancing what I needed to know as I grew. I remember talking in deep conversations with my mom about why certain things going on around me were wrong. When you have a deeper understanding of things you can, not only help others see the error, but you can understand why it might be compelling for others to live that way, which in turn helps you help others.

The people who are struggling with this seem to go about confronting people in the worst way because they don't understand the real issue. All they see is...oh, this is wrong, so I'm going to tell you it is....and it's wrong because either my parents said so, or the Bible said so. (however true it might be doesn't mean people will listen to that kind of mentality) I did this once in high school and immediately saw that I had done more harm that good. However, recently talking with one of these individuals I am referring to, I saw the same thing playing out, only there was no recognition of the harm they had caused.

Now these people are either going to be in the "real world" or are already there and are having these things thrown at them regularly. How will they handle it?? Just think...is it better(as parents) to be there while they are struggling with ideas, to help them along in the right way, or to let them do it after they are gone and there is nothing you can do to help?? hmmm....hard one...

Obviously I am not a parent, so you can take this how you want. I'm not trying to tell anyone how to raise their children for sure, but this is just something I've noticed recently and thought I'd write about it. And maybe no one feels the same way, but I think I'm on to something here.